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musings

Character Changes

I grew up as an air force kid (air force brat in some circles) and that meant my whole family moved every 3 or 4 years pretty much my entire life. My whole family consisted of my Mom, my Dad, and me. There were other relatives around in some of the places we were, and there were always family friends and what-not, but it was essentially just the three of us. The situation gave me the power to change how I represented myself each time I changed schools. If I was tired of being the dorky kid with the striped collared shirts, I could become the dorky kid with the leather jacket and long hair, haha. But really, I somehow realized somewhere in the back of my mind that when meeting new people you would basically be perceived however you represented yourself. If you dressed dorky, you were dorky… if you dressed like a Load (or Hessian or Metalhead or whatever your town called it) you were a Load.

That was great when I entered high school, because no one knew me so I was taken at face value. Eventually people realized I was still a dork at heart, but I got my foot in the proverbial door first. Now, however, I’ve noticed that I have trouble with people figuring out too much about me. I want to maintain some sort of hiding places in my character that I can retreat into when I feel threatened or uncertain. Haha, but now you know too much.