iDallas!
Progression.
The sequence of notes on the screen.
That’ll start to become an integral part of my life for awhile, I think.
Weird to think.
I’ve been avoiding using the computer for too much music stuff… I use computers for everything… but now I am starting to see why oh why people like it so. Everything is easier on a computer. Even when they suck suck suck the life right out through your frantic fingertips.
breaking my back
working all the time
and still nothing’s getting done
or so it seems.
Does that make me a “workaholic” or do I maybe just care about what I do?
We are going somewhere, but I’m just worried that other places are going there a whole lot faster… for whatever reason.
I think maybe we are doing things better from the start… but who knows for sure?
I’ve been tired lately.
I haven’t been that into what I’m doing. It’s a hard life I have, I guess. I mean, it’s not really that hard, but I always take on more projects than I can possibly manage to get done… I need that choking feeling to feel like I’m accomplishing anything. I’ve mentioned this before, too, I guess.
I dunno. Sometimes, I just want to quit doing what I’m doing the way I’m doing it and just go to the beach and float in the water until some kind soul comes by and lifts me up and gives me a slap on the face and tells me what’s what.
We had a nice internet broadcast session last night! 3 hours of mad DJ action. It went pretty well. We’ve got some of it recorded, so we can put it up for listening. That’ll be nice. I’ll get to that eventually.
We’re gearing up to do some more. I’d like to get a full-on weekly show going. I hope I have the time to make it something cool. I’m expecting that other people around will be up for helping out with it.
The show we did last night was for somebody else… we’ll probably continue to do that one monthly even if we don’t manage to launch one of our own.
I made some music…
rattling in my head
am I dead?
rotating reasons in my mind
what did I find?
angry enemy terrorizing me
do I care?
Things are definitely starting to shape up around here… the playroom now has a nice new ping-pong table to go with the pool table… as well as a fancy new dart board! Woo. I haven’t had a chance to play darts in forever! I played a little bit today… I think I’m gonna really get into it… Dartmasterdom, here I come!
Why can’t I just be happy?
Why do I always get hung up on all of the little things that just aren’t perfect? Will I just be chasing those magical mystical rainbows my whole life? Every step I take leads me to want something different. Another color. Something more this or more that. Not even more perfect… just more something else.
It’d almost be somehow easier to manage if it were perfection I’m looking for… at least then I could just mark it up to me being silly and move on with my life… but as it is, it just feels like maybe there really is something else out there drawing me ever onward.
Ministry at the Palladium was a bit of an experience. I decided to make it a little more lively by adding a couple of six and a half dollar long island ice teas into the mix. The floor wasn’t as aggressive as it was for Tool at the Palladium, but it was still a nice mixture of sweat and bellowing men and women. Good show!
I haven’t really enjoyed much of Ministry’s more recent music, but it was still interesting to hear them put their hearts and souls into what they were doing. That’s what all professional musicians do, right? That’s why everyone wants to be one?
Anyway, even their old stuff sort of sounded like their new stuff… all grindy and bass-heavy with Al screeching over the top.
Overall, good show!
I came back bleeding from the chin, with a sore ear and a sweat-drenched shirt.
I want everyone to do their thing.
And I want everyone to have everything they need.
And I want to give whatever I can to help…
But some people just don’t respect what they have available to them. Some people just think everything’s going to go well no matter what we do. That might be true, but assuming so seems a little risky to me.